By Sewa Adebayo
I mean it literally guys so be prepared for what you sign up to lol.
Most Married people can agree that you are basically discovering different things about each other all the time.
The moment you think you know everything about your partner, they’ll shock you with an interesting surprise randomly later on.
I have been married for over 3 lovely years and would like to shed a little light from my experience and some useful advice.
Marriage is as great as you want it to be
Just like working professionally or studying at school, you work hard to receive the great benefits
similar like with any course you study, you may get stressed over the challenges you face with your assignments and deadlines, in a similar way you can experience slight stress and uncertainty in marriage as you must realise you both grew up differently encountering various experiences in your upbringing that you expect each other to adopt to naturally.
Just like you’d get upset at a sibling you can find yourself doing that in your marriage lol because you literally spend most of your time with each other learning how each other likes their space, communication techniques and your personal love languages towards each other.
So here comes the big word COMPROMISE
– you’ll be doing a lot of that throughout your marriage in the most positive way you can.
Also ensure you are committed with love and forgiveness, as no one is perfect.
Be selfless and considerate, reminding yourself daily that you are in this together.
It’s all about understanding one another working towards a common goal.
Realising that the small challenges you face can be worked out especially when you realise you are both worth fighting for, honoring the commitment you both made to each other.
However marriage is also as fun as you want it to be – don’t be a couch potato, binge watching movies with no fun, mix it up honestly ..
Married people have fun too so discover what you both enjoy.
Myself and my husband plan date nights once in a while and every year around our anniversary we go away from the house far from our usual environment to explore different places doing various activities like going to theme parks, golf, travelling etc
I encourage couples to continue dating each other in marriage as that’s what makes it interesting and fun also team up with other couples and do double dates, learn from other couples experiences and take the good and adopt it in yours.
Lastly, if you are actually going through challenges in your first few years which can be expected as you are still learning about each other then please speak to a professional marriage counselor outside of your community as they can advise you fairly in order not to take sides as they don’t know either of you.
Don’t let the Romance die, keep things spontaneous and fun for each other.
I always tell my friends be like little kids with each other enjoying the simple things in life.
If you find this useful and would like more advice on this let us know and we can provide more updates regularly.
Sewa Adebayo
