Hey loves,
This week I presented my research at my university’s teaching and learning conference. It was my very first time speaking about my work in academia in a multidisciplinary setting and I was quite frankly nervous, but I pushed through with only a slight tremble in my voice at the beginning – huge thanks to all the public speaking workshops I’ve done in the past!
It’s in an area of medical education that I find quite interesting – underperformance aka exam failure – because it’s so uncomfortable, but it happens to many medical students for the first time in their lives during the course of medical school. It’s not always about not reading enough either, it could be caused by a number of factors and that’s what got me thinking about how to improve the literature on the non-knowledge related causes so tomorrow’s students are supported effectively.
I got home with an unshakeable grin on my face and excitedly showed the video to my husband who shared in my pride and it clicked that I really, really enjoy this. For a minute I felt a pang of guilt for my long standing passion for international public health – I thought, is there space for both areas in my career? I mean now I’ve done the masters in public health and I’m coming to the end of the masters in medical education – do I have to choose a direction to follow and drop the other?
I was looking at my friend’s Instagram post, she’s in public health training currently and part of her job got her flown to Kenya to deliver public health initiatives. Elizabeth of 2019 would love nothing more than to fly across the globe at the drop of a hat and do exactly that – but I’ve found that my priorities have started to shift; when I have to work away from home for 4 days in a row during my student’s exams, I find myself counting down till Friday because I start to really miss my Samuel.
So while I’m excited about finding a new passion in medical education, I feel guilty about the one I might be leaving behind – but life is dynamic and it’s okay to have a change of direction that suits the person you are per time. It doesn’t make you fraudulent nor does it take from the authenticity of the new passion. Besides, for all I know, in future there may be a convergence between my passions that I am yet to envision! I’m taking the path a step at a time and making each experience count, someday it will all come together and I trust this because I know who holds my future – God.
Till next time,
Dr. ETK xo
